Holding Pattern

I'm entering a phase in the wait in wondering if I'll ever travel out of the United States.

The mail arrived today with no indication of a visa. This means that I still cannot fly outside of the country. I'm fortunate enough to be able to reschedule my flight, but it is costing money and that is never good. Furthermore, I am starting to shut down mentally. There doesn't appear to be a silver lining when all I hear is empty mailboxes and yet-to-be-delivered documents. I hope things will improve come Wednesday when the mail resumes, but until I hear the visa has arrived, I will not pack my bags nor make further plans. I can't bring myself to doing those tasks when there is such frustration and disappointment.

And to make things worse, I feel like I'm letting many other people down. The church expected me to be gone last weekend. The children in Liberia do not have the shirts and books I have to take with me. And none of this weighs well with me right now. I don't like letting people down, nor do I like to be a disappointment for others. I can only hope, pray and wait for the visa to arrive.

AUGH!!!!